You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize