May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize