You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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