Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
i out mim tonsoeep
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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