Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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