at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
