She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I'm always down for nudity.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
