didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize