another moral hangover. fuck.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
