I wannas sexs uuuuu
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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