so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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