Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize