id be glad to
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
