we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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