I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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