The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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