He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize