there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
