worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
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At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
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'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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