I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
