My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
