he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
