I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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