so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I looked at my own cervix.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
