Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He better not be in your backpack
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize