I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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