Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Can I color on your dick again?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
