I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Quick, to the slutcave!
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
