Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
dude i'm inner monologue high
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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