Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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