Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
