Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Randomize