i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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