i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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