its not stalking. its research.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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