felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Houston, we have a blender
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
