every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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