im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
