Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
