dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
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