oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
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Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
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Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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