his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
We're not piercing ourselves today.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Randomize
