worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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