Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Tornado booty call.. dedication
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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