i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
