you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Randomize
