That's when you crack a 10am beer
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Randomize
