It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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