im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
