well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
