also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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