Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
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