Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
